The Morning After

[cutting_edgex23]

It's quiet in the apartment.

Even the cats appear to be worn out -- unless Mr. Simmons is cat-sitting, which is a possibility.

They were a significant distraction to planning.

This may also explain why X's bedroom door is closed.






Or not.

Comments

[ellectrical]

The cats being shut up in X's room also meant that Elle could get a few hours of sleep.

Though once they'd finally worked out the last few details, there was little in the world that could have stopped Elle from passing out on the couch. It's not her fault that it's so perfect for her height, and that X keeps a ridiculously low amount of a sugar in her apartment.

(The now empty cupcake plate, as well as an empty glass of milk, are left on the kitchen table along with Elle's closed laptop, and a variety of notes and sketches that have been stacked orderly next to the computer.)

At this point, however, there's enough light slipping in through the windows that Elle, who never sleeps too deeply, is starting to stir.

[cutting_edgex23]

There are a few creaky floorboards in the stairwell, and it seems as if someone is not being particularly careful to avoid them.

X may have made this choice deliberately.

She also makes no effort to be silent as she unlocks and opens the apartment door, a brown paper bag of groceries tucked under one arm.

She'll approach Elle's position once she's deposited the bag in the kitchen.

It does not take very long.

[ellectrical]

She's pushing herself into a sitting position as X enters the apartment. Elle follows some fairly normal morning routines - rubbing at her eyes, combing a hand through what's now an unpleasant tangle of blonde hair.

When she sees X's bag - "I could've gone with you."

It's a feeble protest. This would have cut into her already short amount of sleep.

[cutting_edgex23]

"It was not difficult," X says in response.

"Eggs and fruit are not heavy."

Someone may have recently discovered a fondness for peaches.

Who knew?

[ellectrical]

Elle pushes herself off the couch, moving in socked-feet toward the kitchen ares.

"I'll have to do it," Elle answers.

At some point, probably.

[cutting_edgex23]

X tilts her head slightly, considering that.

"I will need bread in a few days."

Beat.

"And oatmeal."

And more cat food.

"For practice."

[ellectrical]

"Yeah."

That sounds like it will work. Elle sits down at the kitchen table, watching X.

Beat.

"I'll have money."

If that's important, too.

[cutting_edgex23]

"That will be useful," X acknowledges, unloading the shopping bag and pulling a few more things out of cupboards and the fridge.

"In your world."

Beat.

"Bar changes currency, too. If it is necessary."

[ellectrical]

Pause.

"Does your world have dollars?"

Dollars, yen, and euro tend to be the must-know in the Company. But most of Elle's jobs hadn't involved business transactions.

[cutting_edgex23]

"Yes."

Beat.

"I do not know if the years and serial numbers will be problematic."

[ellectrical]

Not to even get into the possibility of different presidents.

Elle shrugs. "I'll get it from the bar."

Beat.

"It should work."

[cutting_edgex23]

"It was effective when I was purchasing weapons on Santo. With Jayne."

If that helps?

X puts butter on the pan, and then cracks two eggs into it.

Hopefully Elle does not mind sunny side up.

[ellectrical]

Elle nods.

Even if it takes her a moment to figure out how it helps.



She watches X at the stove for a while before she speaks again.

"I had a dream."

[cutting_edgex23]

X's attention instantly focuses on Elle.

She is not frowning. Not quite.

"It was bad?"

X does not have much experience with the good kind, as it happens.

[ellectrical]

"It -"

She couldn't call it 'bad.' Not really.

"It was - my Dad. Like I was with him."

Elle doesn't have much experience with dreams at all, but it's still the next part that stands out to her.

"He knew he was dead."

[cutting_edgex23]

"Oh."

X has gone very still.

Mechanically -- more mechanically than she has been for some time -- she transfers the eggs to a plate and moves to set it on the table.

She is not looking at Elle.

"He did not try to hurt you?"

She does not mean physically.

[ellectrical]

Elle's own eyes have fallen at X's movement. A part of her is wishing she hadn't said anything at all, but she still makes herself continue it.

"He helped me."

It's not even close to an answer.

"I - figured out what I have to do because he helped me."

[cutting_edgex23]

"Oh. I -- "

At this point X does look up, if only briefly.

Then she heads back to the stove to make her own breakfast.

"That is good."

She does not ask if the dream was real.

Or if a telepath was in range.

That would be cruel.

[ellectrical]

"X."

Elle hasn't looked up. Not even to her breakfast.



"It's not like your mother."

[cutting_edgex23]

"Okay," X says, stirring her eggs with a spatula.

She is not hesitant, just quiet.

At least the eggs are not burning.

Then she looks over at Elle.

"I do not know what it is like."

And most of the time she does not mind.

There are occasions, however, where lack of experience is a killer.

She is not sure if this is one.

[ellectrical]

Elle meets X's eyes again.

There are no illusions about this. Dream or telepath or whatever it could have been, when it came down to it, it didn't really matter.

"He wouldn't have done it if he wasn't dead."

[cutting_edgex23]

There is a flicker in X's expression, there and gone again.

Very few things linger.

"I know."

X does not say she is sorry.

It is not relevant. Not this time.

And then she dumps the scrambled eggs onto a plate, turns off the burner, and slides into a seat at the table.

"But it is still good. That you know what to do. Now."

It's not love, but it's something.

It's worth something.

[ellectrical]

Her eyes drop to her own plate, and Elle reaches for the fork next to it.

She's using its side to cut into part of one of the fried eggs when she says, "River said it'd make it better."

Beat.

"That they're dead."

The pronoun is ambiguous, mostly just an echo of what River had said.

[cutting_edgex23]

X shrugs, one-shouldered and quick.

Then she cuts into her own eggs, lifting up a forkful and swallowing.

"Sometimes it stops."

Beat.

"When they die."

[ellectrical]

The clatter of forks against the plates go on for a few minutes before Elle speaks again.

"I want to leave."

There is no doubt in that. She doesn't have to die, or be locked up, or any other alternative. She wants to work for herself.

But it's been eighteen years. Most of her life. And no one to really hate.

It's why it's not as simple as that.

"I don't know if I want it to stop."

[cutting_edgex23]

X's fork pauses in its journey from her plate to her mouth, and she studies Elle in silence.

It lasts for a very long time.

Then --

"Okay."

X does not know what else to say. And in a lot of ways it is the truth.

Elle's world is not X's, and the Company --

Similar though it seems to have been, it is not the Facility.

Not quite.

[ellectrical]

Elle has begun mulching her own eggs with her fork.

She'll inevitably eat them, too. It was a long night.

But she adds something she didn't say before.

"I want to know."

[cutting_edgex23]

There's a momentary delay as X runs through the potential correlations for that statement.

Then --

"Okay."

Beat.

"It is better to know. If you can."

She swallows, looking at Elle.

"You know how?"

[ellectrical]

There's a very brief, mirthless sort of laugh. She seems to stop herself just as it starts, and takes a forkful of the egg before saying anything.

"He wouldn't tell me that."

After another forkful, "I can look."

[cutting_edgex23]

X's expression sharpens.

It's the kind of expression a computer would have running through all the variables on a simulation --

If a computer could be said to have an expression.

"He knew?"

[ellectrical]

Elle hesitates, her fork pausing above her plate. She doesn't look at X.

"He knew what happened," she decides.

[cutting_edgex23]

X's gaze stays steady on Elle.

"There are records?"

If not, there are other ways of getting information.

Between them X and Elle probably have most of them covered.

[ellectrical]

She starts playing with what's left of the egg again.

"He took them."

[cutting_edgex23]

"Oh."

That requires recalculation.

It may take a few minutes.

[ellectrical]

It's not until the silence that follows that Elle looks back up at X. And puts her fork down.

This may take a few minutes, as well.

"It's okay."

Beat. "It's my job."

[cutting_edgex23]

"You are my friend," X says.

She wants to help.

[ellectrical]

"But -"

When X says it, she can understand it. And what it means. It's not about that she knows some of it will be on her own, and it's definitely not that she doesn't want X's help.

" - you're mine."

It's not quite what she means to say. But she doesn't know how else to say it, that she's not sure she wants it to be X's job, too. Or at least, she doesn't want it to have to be X's job. Elle doesn't have any other words for it -

"I don't want to - hurt you."

[cutting_edgex23]

X is silent for a long time, watching Elle again.

Considering.

Then she nods, just a little.

It's possible a sigh is involved, too, but it's not very loud.

"I will not let you," is what she says at last.

It is not the same kind of promise it was the last time.

Not at all.

[ellectrical]

"Okay," Elle answers.

She can trust that.

It doesn't take her too long to finish the rest of the eggs, pulverized as they are by now.

[cutting_edgex23]

"Okay," X repeats.

And maybe it really is.

In a few seconds she'll gather up the plates, wash then, and set them on the rack to dry.

Then it will be time to feed the cats.

And the fish.

[ellectrical]

In the meantime, Elle opens the laptop, and begins to sort through their notes.

It's a lot. X is thorough. Elle had plenty of details.

And absolutely all of it will be necessary.

After the cats and fish are fed, they'll be finishing up their plans for when to leave.