Mission: Prom Dress

[cutting_edgex23]

It's a sunny day, on the warmer side of cool, and the streets are full of people. X -- after discussing strategy with her neighbors and a few of her more adventurous teammates (the Stepford Cuckoos know a lot about clothing, for obvious reasons) -- leads the way toward Embarcadero Center.

They can get lunch before or after finding a dress. And shoes.

X has been told purses are important, too. And jewelry. She is not sure she believes this.

But maybe Parker and Meg will have ideas about that, too.

She can hope. It will probably not be in vain.

Comments

[parkerlee]

Parker most certainly has ideas, and she's sure Meg will too.

She does what she always does when exploring a new mall--stopping at the map display to get oriented.

"Well," she says to her companions. "I'd say we start at the most logical place? There's a formal dress place down on this level. Just on the other side of the Bath and Body Works."

Not all that far away from them.

"Are you guys ready for this?" she asks, grinning at Meg and Laura over her shoulder as they stand outside the entrance to a store with long dresses and streamers in the shop windows.

[cutting_edgex23]

X tilts her head, studying the display and the patrons, and then shifting position so she can scout more of the interior without entering.

Not just yet, anyway.

"It will be okay," she says after a moment.

The look she is giving one mannequin is only slightly wary.

"But I do not want a clutch purse."

[noteful]

Meg is doing a fair bit of headtilting, too.

(You try skipping 20 years of fashion sometime and see how confused you get.)

"They're more trouble than they're worth," Meg says. "You never have your hands free."

That much, at least, she knows.

[parkerlee]

"One thing at a time, ladies," Parker says cheerfully. "Otherwise, we'll burn out in the first hour."

Dress shopping is not for the faint-hearted.

"First things first. Dress. We'll work outward from there."

Parker takes up position between her two friends, hooking her arms through their elbows. Time to see what Oz has to offer.

"Ready? Set? Tallyho. This will be fun."

[cutting_edgex23]

At least this can be said of X -- she does not drag her feet.

She does, however, extricate her arm from Parker's grasp during the first few minutes of dress-perusal.

Not least because she needs both arms to hold up the dresses.

"Two pieces are necessary?"

X, for the record, is opposed to corsets.

[noteful]

"No," Meg says, distractedly.

She's staring at the outfit on one of the mannequins, trying to make it make some kind of sense.

It's not that she's considering it as a viable option -- for one thing, it does not meet Laura's basic requirement of providing weapons concealment; Meg's pretty sure you couldn't conceal so much as a pack of gum in that dress, never mind anything useful.

It's just . . .

"How does that even qualify as a dress?"

[parkerlee]

"I'd say you'd have to be a dominatrix with a safari fetish."

Parker's sure they're out there.

"Congrats, Meg. It'll be hard to spot a worse one than that."

Part of the fun of shopping for dresses is finding the best No way in hell option.

"We can definitely do better."

[cutting_edgex23]

X, meanwhile, is investigating the dress Meg pointed out.

Carefully.

"The slit is not necessary?"

Beat.

"In the skirt."

You would think it would make it easier to move, but really, due to the placement, the fabric will just get tangled around X's legs.

If she has to move quickly.

[noteful]

"I hope it's going to be hard to get worse than this."

If it's not . . . Meg is going to start stockpiling clothes now.

And she's not exactly living in fashion's most glorious decade.

"Nothing about that dress is necessary."

Not the slit, not the fabric, not the . . . whatever the heck that is going on around the waist.

[parkerlee]

Parker, unfazed, has moved on to the next rack.

"Well, no promises," she says. "But this is just the nature of the beast. You have to wade through a lot of crap in order to find the good stuff."

"Like this. Speaking of scary."

Parker pulls a green dress off a rack, holding it up under her chin.

"I feel like a really slutty Statue of Liberty."

[cutting_edgex23]

X reaches out to flick the neckline.

Carefully.

"It is not copper."

Someone, it seems, is missing the point.

[parkerlee]

"It might be a better dress if it were." Parker grins. "I was thinking more that it's a pale green drape."

Parker studies Laura, and then experimentally holds the dress up under her chin.

"Hmmm. Not the best color. Even if the dress was remotely workable."

Parker hangs the dress up again.

"Moving on. What's next?"

[noteful]

Meg has drifted a little further into the store.

She's beginning to get a feel for how to compare these dresses to one another, and not to what she's used to from home.

"This doesn't seem bad, does it?"

She pulls it from the rack and holds it out for inspection.

"I think I like the colors for you, Laura."

[cutting_edgex23]

X takes a step forward, studying the dress, brushing her hand against the fabric.

"They are Hellion's colors."

Beat.

Beat.

"It is okay."

She'll try it on, anyway. That is -- appropriate, right?

[parkerlee]

Parker has no idea who Hellion is, but the dress isn't bad.

"Here. I'll find a saleswoman and ask to have a dressing room started for us."

Parker holds out her hand for the dress.

"No point in trying on until we have a few choices."

[cutting_edgex23]

"Okay," X says, only a little hesitantly.

Then she hands the dress over to Parker, flicks a quick look at Meg, and turns back to the racks of dresses.

And shortly after Parker wanders back from her search for a sales associate, X brushes her fingers against this dress.

"It would not be difficult to disguise. If I needed to cut it."

She still makes no move to pull it off the rack. No move at all.

[noteful]

Meg looks at it.

"Well," she says, trying to be non-judgmental, even though it appears to be made out of lace and toilet paper and pre-shredded by a cat, "do you like it?"

Because it's Laura's prom dress they're looking for, and if Laura likes it . . . Meg will hold her tongue.

[parkerlee]

"Well....um.....white. It can be hard to keep clean. And would there be a visibility issue? I mean, combat-wise, would white make you too easy to spot?"

Parker is aiming for tact.

[cutting_edgex23]

X flicks a quick look to a nearby rack. Particularly the dress that looks like this.

"Only if people are not wearing things like that."

Beat.

"It is likely?"

[noteful]

"I hope not," Meg says.

It's . . .

". . . how many Barbies did they have to skin to make that thing?"

[parkerlee]

"Oh. My. God. At least three hundred."

Parker pulls the dress off the rack with a gleeful grin.

"Ladies, I think I'm going to have to try this one on just for the sheer entertainment factor."

"Meg, you'll have to take the picture."

Parker has come on this trip prepared to document the fun. Her camera is safely tucked in her purse.

[cutting_edgex23]

X looks gobsmacked.






"You are sure it is not sentient?"

It could be.

It might even eat Parker.

(Or -- something. If it were a Skrull in disguise.)

[noteful]

"It's probably just a really . . . really pink dress."

Probably.

"Unless sentient clothes are common on your world."

And call her crazy, but that seems like the sort of thing Laura would know and would have warned them about.

Meg moves away from the Giant Pink (Figurative) Monstrocity, and pulls another dress off the rack.

"Good color," she says.

[cutting_edgex23]

X pauses in her own foray deeper into the dresses and looks at what Meg is indicating.

Her head tilts. Then it tilts a little more.

Then --

"I like it. The color."

Beat.

"But the bow is a very effective handhold. For an opponent."

She still likes the color, though.

[noteful]

Meg turns the dress, considering it.

"It wouldn't be hard to take the bow off, actually.

"If that was the only problem."